2020.02.09 战争与和平》不断向我展示新的东西

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Yiyun Li: “I read “War and Peace” every year. Each time I see new things”
The Chinese-American novelist hoards unconventional treasures

Feb 19th 2020 (Updated Apr 29th 2020)

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“War and Peace” keeps revealing new things to me
I read it every year. Each time I see new things that I missed before. This copy has been here for 12 or 13 years. I have a lot of sticky notes and tags on the book’s margins. I used to have a system, where on one reading I would use pink tags, on the next I’d use green, and so on. Eventually I ran out of colours and then I ran out of space. I think the system is a little overwhelming even for me. I need to get a fresh copy.


My cleaver has come a long way with me
My sister bought me this cleaver when I was preparing to leave China for America in 1996. It was one of the most expensive ones available. We didn’t know what I was going to and thought I should take everything I needed for a new life in two suitcases. I even packed sanitary towels. I could certainly get a better meat cleaver in America, but this one is still good. I chop with it every day. I use it for vegetables and tofu even though you don’t need a cleaver for those. I think of myself as a domestic person – cooking means a lot to me. When I was little my father cooked for us, and he trained me to chop vegetables without looking. How to position my fingers. I think that this meat cleaver is going to have a long life with me. You get used to the weight of the knife.



I treasure the owl my son made at elementary school My son was very artistic.
This owl was not one of his prize creations but I discovered it in his closet after he died when he was 16. We have so many paintings by him in our house, but this little thing – it’s a mystery. I get obsessed looking at it. It’s a clay owl, it’s also a Cupid with wings and a bow and arrow on the back. Strangely, the owl has a sombrero on top of his head. Even stranger, he has the most pensive eyes. The sombrero and bow make him seem quite comical but when you look at his eyes he’s sad. I feel like there are a lot of paintings I can tell the story of but I don’t know what this says. It’s just a lovely object. I miss my son bitterly every day, so I have the owl next to my computer. It’s a treasure for me.


This deer antler reminds me of being carefree
When our dog was a puppy, my family would take a hike with him every Sunday out in Oakland, California, and on one of these walks he found the antler. It’s just one of those good memories – the kids were still young, the puppy was young, and my husband and I were a little younger than we are now. I think when children grow up there are so many memories, some are in our heads and some leave an object in our lives. There are lots of things that have left my life, but this one is going to stay.


This photo album is a piece of history
When my parents came to visit ten years ago they brought this photo album, which belonged to my mother, and left it with me. The earliest pictures are from the 1950s. Most of them are from my mother’s childhood in Zhejiang in eastern China. Back then it was unusual to take pictures – you’d do it once a year in a gallery or a studio. Many of the photos are of my mother’s friends, a group who went to school together, graduated, took a picture, and then spread into different corners of China and never saw each other again. I imagine there are lots of people in that album my mother hasn’t seen since they took the photos. These people don’t know they’ve ended up in my hands.


My younger son captured an enduring image of my family
This drawing is just four figures: sticks, circles and little hands sticking out. It’s five-year-old James’s perception of the family. Something crystallised in that moment – from a child’s eyes I see us as a unit. And that’s important because though we’re three now, we’ll always be a family of four.

As told to Abigail Fielding-Smith

photographs rich begany



李逸云："我每年都读《战争与和平》。每次我都会看到新的东西"
这位华裔美国小说家囤积了非常规的宝藏

2020年2月19日（2020年4月29日更新）。


"战争与和平》不断向我展示新的东西
我每年都读它。每次我都会看到以前错过的新东西。这本《战争与和平》在这里已经有12或13年了。我在书的空白处贴了很多便条和标签。我曾经有一个系统，在一次阅读时，我会用粉红色的标签，在下一次阅读时，我会用绿色的，以此类推。最终我用完了颜色，然后我也用完了空间。我认为这个系统即使对我来说也有点不堪重负。我需要得到一个新的副本。


我的菜刀伴随我走过了漫长的道路
1996年我准备离开中国去美国时，我姐姐给我买了这把菜刀。这是最昂贵的一种。我们不知道我要去什么地方，认为我应该把新生活所需的一切都装在两个行李箱里。我甚至还带了卫生巾。我当然可以在美国买到更好的切肉刀，但这把刀还是不错的。我每天都用它切菜。我用它来切蔬菜和豆腐，尽管你不需要用菜刀来切这些东西。我认为自己是一个家庭主妇--烹饪对我来说意味着很多。在我小的时候，我父亲为我们做饭，他训练我不看就切菜。如何定位我的手指。我想，这把切肉刀将与我有很长的生命。你会习惯于刀的重量。



我很珍惜我儿子在小学时做的猫头鹰 我儿子很有艺术细胞。
这只猫头鹰不是他的获奖作品之一，但在他16岁去世后，我在他的衣柜里发现了它。我们家有很多他的画作，但这个小东西--它是一个谜。我看着它就着了迷。这是一只粘土猫头鹰，也是一只带翅膀的丘比特，后面还有弓和箭。奇怪的是，这只猫头鹰的头顶上有一顶墨西哥帽。更奇怪的是，他有一双最沉思的眼睛。斗篷和弓使他看起来相当滑稽，但当你看他的眼睛时，他却很悲伤。我觉得有很多画我都可以讲故事，但我不知道这幅画说明了什么。它只是一个可爱的物体。我每天都在苦苦思念我的儿子，所以我把这只猫头鹰放在我的电脑旁边。它是我的一个宝物。


这个鹿角让我想起了无忧无虑的日子
当我们的狗还是一只小狗的时候，我的家人每个星期天都会带着它到加州奥克兰去远足，在一次散步中，他发现了这个鹿角。这只是其中一段美好的回忆--当时孩子们还小，小狗还小，我和丈夫比现在还小一点。我想，当孩子们长大后，有太多的记忆，有些是在我们的脑海中，有些则是在我们的生活中留下了一个物件。有很多东西都离开了我的生活，但这个东西要留下来。


这本相册是一段历史
十年前我父母来探望我时，他们带来了这本属于我母亲的相册，并把它留给了我。最早的照片是上世纪50年代的。其中大部分是我母亲在中国东部的浙江的童年。在那时，拍照是不寻常的--你每年都会在画廊或工作室拍一次。许多照片是我母亲的朋友们，他们是一群一起上学、毕业、拍照的人，然后分散到中国的不同角落，再也没有见过面。我想象那本相册里有很多人，我母亲在他们拍完照片后就再也没有见过。这些人不知道他们最后落到了我的手里。


我的小儿子捕捉到了我家庭的一个永恒的形象
这幅画只有四个人物：棍子、圆圈和伸出来的小手。这是五岁的詹姆斯对这个家庭的看法。有些东西在那一刻凝固了--从孩子的眼中，我看到我们是一个整体。这一点很重要，因为虽然我们现在是三个人，但我们永远是一个四口之家。

阿比盖尔-菲尔丁-史密斯说。

照片：Rich Begany